♡ dream journal ♡
I had the worst dream ever. It was so vivid. I’m literally heartbroken.
It was my birthday. I don’t know what year I was turning. Me, Nick (my boyfriend) and his ex girlfriend who is also my friend, Alenna went to Carkeek Park. It’s a park with trails and woods & a beach in Seattle. All three of us went on a trail together but eventually we got lost. Nick & Alenna got lost together and I got lost on my own. I don’t really remember if I went to look for them or not but when I found them Nick decided to break up with me for Alenna. I was so heart broken.
Later, me and Nick were hanging out (I don’t remember where or why) but I asked him why her and all that stuff. Then I guess he came to a realization that he should be with me and I remember the feeling of joy I had.
We had been dating again for a little while I noticed that Nick would call & text Alenna constantly. And when they saw each other it was like I didn’t exist and they would talk and laugh together.
We were at my house one day and he finally made the decision that he didn’t want to be with me anymore. He wanted to be with Alenna. I was so angry I began to yell and say things like “I love you, my mom loves you! How could you do this to us?” I kicked him out of my house. I got on the floor and skyped him (he was with his friend Tommy too) and I was apologizing and asking him to come back and asking him to give me another chance. Then Alenna popped up in the background. I just started crying. Then my mom walked in the front door and I yelled, “Nick left!” and she got on the floor hugging me and crying with me.
Later, he invited me to the mall with him, tommy, alenna, me and someone else I can’t remember. His father (who is currently deceased) gave everyone jerseys. But mine was special. It was purple and it had one long sleeve and one short one. His dad said to me “the short sleeve is good for punching or pitching” (?? I dont remember) Then he was like I hope your a Bulls fan but it was a purple jersey??
Then I looked over and saw Nick and Alenna flirting and hugging the way we used to. I woke up with that horrible feeling of loneliness. the feeling where you realize that you are alone and you have no one.
I feel so terrible I don’t even want to see either of them. I just want to hide in my room.